Marriage and Family

Because of the expense involved in formal marriage, more than half of all couples live together rather than marrying. Traditional ceremonies involve two or more days of eating, drinking, dancing, and speeches. When a couple becomes engaged, the two families begin negotiations regarding the bogadi (bride-price), which the groom’s family gives to the bride’s family. Civil weddings are sometimes followed by traditional celebrations.

In Botswana, children may be named for some circumstance related to their birth and also given a pet name by which they are known at home. Students often give themselves nicknames for use at school. Traditionally, the father’s first name became the child’s surname; now the child takes the father’s surname. Upon the birth of her first child, a woman is thereafter referred to as the mother of that child (for example, Mma Jarney in Setswana or Bakajamey in Tjikalanga).

Originally, Batswana lived in large villages with their agricultural and grazing lands at a distance. With women at the masimo (fields) and men at the cattle posts, families were apart much of the time. Then in 1852 Dutch colonists in South Africa began to move into the area and posed a threat to the Batswana. The Tswana chiefs sought British protection from these immigrants, known as the Boer, and became a British colony in 1885. During these colonial times, many men began working in South African mines. Later, young people moved to cities in search of work, but families remained tied through an extended family network.

Today, although few men now work in South Africa, a continuous search for employment keeps families apart. For instance, married couples who are teachers might work on the other side of the country from one another. With men so often absent, women remain primarily responsible for the family, agriculture, and entrepreneurial pursuits. In rural areas, women head the majority of families, but they also receive help from members of the extended family living nearby.

Eating

Bogobe (porridge) made from mabele (sorghum), maize, or millet (in the northeast) is a staple food. It is served soft and often soured for breakfast, and thick for the midday and evening meals. Bogobe is accompanied by relish to add variety to a meal. A popular relish is made of onions, chicken stock, and tomato sauce. Paleche (white maize), although vulnerable to drought, is replacing sorghum as the primary grain.

Many people have tea, the thick sorghum drink mageu, or soft porridge called motogo for breakfast. Some enjoy having dikuku, a treat made of deep-fried dough, with tea for breakfast or lunch. Various fruits and vegetables are eaten in season. Phane, worms gathered from the mophane trees in the northeast, are considered a delicacy and dried in hot ashes before being eaten. Goats and chickens are raised for meat, and cattle are slaughtered for special occasions such as weddings and funerals. Rice is served instead of bogobe at weddings.

Eating habits vary in urban and rural homes, but most families eat meals from common bowls or plates. Children share a bowl among themselves, and visitors receive separate plates. Utensils are used, but some foods are eaten with the hands. Everyone usually leaves a little food behind to let their hosts know that the meal has been filling. Guests often say Ke itumetse (“I am pleased”) to thank the hosts. Drinks are never shared.

Socializing

Among acquaintances and when greeting an elder or one of higher social status, Tswana use formal verbal greetings accompanied by a handshake, using the right hand while supporting one’s elbow with the left hand. The handshake is less a grasp than a touching of palms and fingertips. Elders or those approaching greet first. Common adult greetings are Dumela Rra, Otsogile jang? and Dumela Mma, O tsogile jang? They mean “Greetings sir/madam, how did you wake?” The response is Ke tsogile sentle, or “I awoke well.” Informal greetings are used among children and peers. For instance, the Setswana reply to O kae? (“How are you?”) is Ke teng (literally, “I am here,” meaning “fine”). Tsamaya sentle, which means “Go well,” is said to someone who is departing. Sala sentle, or “Stay well,” is said to someone staying.

Greeting customs vary for other ethnic groups. For example, among the Kalanga the younger person always greets first. Young children greet elders by extending both hands or clapping; the elder responds by kissing both hands and saying Wa muka? (“Are you well?”).

People may press their hands—palms and fingers together—in front of their chest before accepting a gift with both hands. Gifts are given with both hands or with the right hand supported by the left at the elbow. It is impolite to walk between two people who are in conversation. If passing through cannot be avoided, one bows below the level of the conversation and says Intshwarele, or “Excuse me.” To show respect for elders during conversation, younger people look down rather than into the eyes.

Relatives visit one another as often as they can. Most visits are not arranged in advance because few people have telephones, and unannounced visitors are welcomed into the home. Guests are offered water or tea to drink. Anyone who arrives at mealtime is expected to eat with the family. Guests who are not hungry are expected to taste the food and then take some home with them. Urban relatives often bring staples and household goods as gifts, and people from rural areas bring in-season crops. Acquaintances are not expected to bring gifts.

Much socializing takes place at general stores, church activities, and at the standpipe where people get water. Men socialize at local depots that sell chibuku (sorghum beer).

Recreation

Batswana enjoy visiting, dancing, singing, and playing sports. Young men play soccer, and there are many village teams. Schools offer all students field sports, such as running, jumping, and discus throwing, as well as ball sports, including soccer, softball, volleyball, and netball. Schools also sponsor choirs and traditional dance groups that perform at public events. Traditional dancing to the accompaniment of drums played by women is popular in villages. At public performances some dancers use loud whistles to direct movement. Ballroom dancing is popular in cities, especially among young professionals.

Holidays and Celebrations

Botswana celebrates the New Year on the first two days in January. Easter is celebrated from Good Friday, the Friday preceding Easter, through Easter Monday. Celebrations center around church and family. Ascension Day, 40 days after Easter, marks the day when Jesus Christ is said to have ascended to heaven.

President’s Day is a holiday on the third weekend in July. Over this four-day weekend, many people return to their home villages to be with their extended families. Government-sponsored programs on this holiday open with prayer and feature traditional dancing, singing, speeches, and poems of praise. Botswana Day, 30 September, commemorates Botswana’s independence from the British on 30 September 1966.

Christmas is the most important holiday, and it is again traditional for Batswana to return to their home villages for the festivities. Family members usually give each other new clothes at this time. Boxing Day (26 December) derives from an old British custom when workers in the trade and service industries carried around small earthenware boxes and collected tips. Nowadays it is a time to relax and visit.

Source: Encarta Interactive World Atlas

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